Due to a family emergency and my general feeling of ickyness there will be no debate topic for this week. However the topic scheduled for this week, overpopulation, we will carried over to next week and my opening argument will be posted on next Monday as usual. Good luck and blessings, Prana

Just a quickie update…

My two articles, My Article On Marijuana and What I’ve Learned, have been published in the ePublication Self Expressions. Also, if you’re insterested in what I do when I’m not debating, please visit The Pervert Club, (the verb not the noun) which is my humor site or Chewing The Fat, which is a group blog detailing my wieght loss. The coming weeks debate topic will be Over Population, and will be posted as always on Monday.

Good luck and blessings, Prana

The last two debate topics were a bit wieghty so I felt like this week we should focus on something a little less controversial and give everyone some time to breath.

This weeks debate is about fear and control and how those two things are essencially the same thing. What got me to thinking about all this was a recent experience. I joined a debate group, because well, that’s what I do, debate. It seemed innocent enough. The group was advertised as a more like a family of free thinkers with open minds who were on the more peaceful and easy going side. That described me I thought, so I joined. Everything was fine the first few days until I actually joined the discussion. That’s when all hell broke loose.

Now let me get this out of the way. This isn’t about bashing this group, which by the way is full of some really wonderful people. So don’t ask me for names or anything cause you won’t get them. I’m only trying to give a little insite into where this weeks topic is coming from so try to remember that. Back to the issue. All hell broke loose.

It seems my particular views were the opposite of just about everyone in the group. You wouldn’t think this would be a problem since the groups purpose is discussion, but some people got very very upset. I got called a lot of really vulgar names and threatened and just generally bashed which hurt my feelings. But what hurt worse was that not many people in the group stood up for me or backed me up when people got abusive. I stayed to finish the debate because if you know me at all you know I’m not the kinda person who runs off with her tail between her legs. But after that I unsubscribed.

I spent all of yesterday thinking about why people get abusive like that and why people don’t come to the rescue of the people being abused. And it dawned on me, fear of control and controlling fear. What I mean by this is that people get abusive and curse at you and threaten and so on, because they are afraid of you. Not you specifically, but your vote, your way of life, and how your life might effect thiers. For instance, say you love chocolate cake. But I’m really against the use of chocolate cake. Some people would get freaked out. What if I vote against cake? What if I tell other people about why cake is bad and convince them to take my side? What if all the cake goes away and no one gets cake ever again? Scary huh?

And people don’t like to be controlled. They don’t like to have thier rights taken away or to be told how to live. Neither do I, so I understand. But even more than people fear being controlled, they fear not being able to control others. No cake is scary, but not being able to control the cake decision, now thats really scary. Because people are strange, erratic and unpredictable. You might start thinking how one cake-hater could effect the rest of the world and how there is nothing you can do to stop the cake-haters.

Many things we do are based on fear, and all fear comes from control. We work because we fear being poor because if we’re poor we have no control over our quality of life or if we even get to live. We seek out love because we fear being alone, because being alone means we can’t control our future. Will someone remember us? Will they love us? Will we have kids? What will our family think if we don’t get married? What about society? All fear stems from control. Which is why some people royally freak out.

You know the people I’m talking about. The ones who try to tell you that only thier religion is right, or thier sexual preference or thier morals. The people who try to use scare tactics to force you to believe what they do. They tell you that you’ll go to hell, they call you names or label you, associate you with negative things or threaten to harm you or your way of life. It’s the people who blow up abortion clinics or burn churches. It’s the people who say things like ‘go back to your own country’ or ‘thats not a womans place’.

On the flip side you have people who are so afraid of controlling others (because whatever you do, might happen to you) that they do nothing. You know what I mean. That relative that no matter what someone in the family does they make excuses for them. The friend who never ever disagrees with you for fear of hurting your feelings. Or in this case, group mods who see you getting bashed and don’t do anything about it. I’m all for free speech and I’m against censorship. But to me, censorship is when you stop someone from expressing thier ideas, beliefs, way of life or views. Putting someone on moderation for calling someone things like slut, nazi and babykiller…not censorship.

People have freedoms and rights, and I hope they always do because I’m a person and I like my rights. And in a perfect world there would be as few rules and regulations as possible. But some people want absolute freedom and that just don’t jive. Because some people are crazy or just plain mean. Those people can’t govern themselves. It’s a lofty idea to say you think there should be no laws, but I don’t think you’ll feel the same way when someone you love is killed or raped or beat. There have to be laws, to protect people. And there has to be rules, to protect peoples feelings and to keep things productive.

Yes, it means your controlling someone, and yes it means someone will be controlling you. But sometimes a little control is neccesary to protect people. And if you’re really afraid of what other people believe and how they live, your best weapon is education. I garauntee you that teaching people beats bashing people anyday. Of course if the lesson your trying to teach is mixed up in a lot of name calling and foul language, your not going to get far. It’s like slapping someone while trying to tell them not to run away because there’s a bear behind them. You may be telling the truth and giving good advice but all they can think about is getting away from you and the beating.

I guess what I’m trying to say is, you have to ask yourself when you find yourself getting upset about what another person says or does or thinks, will this really hurt me? And whats the best way to change thier mind? And when you see someone getting womped on, physically, verbally, whatever, you gotta ask yourself, is this how I would want to be treated? And if I sit by and let it happen aren’t I a little guilty myself?

Learn to control your fear, and not to fear control so much. And maybe we’ll all learn something, like compassion, respect and kindness. Now pass the cake.

Debate it in the forums. Click here!